Who are the abusers?
90% of all perpetrators are known by the child.
60% of perpetrators are known by the family but are not family members. (Think neighbors, babysitters, friends of the parents, coaches, and other close adults)
30% of perpetrators are family members (think mom, dad, uncle, cousins)
10% of perpetrators are strangers
(Child Maltreatment report 2006)
Do children harm other children?
23% of perpetrators are under the age of 18.
What is sexual abuse:
Sexual abuse is any type of sexual contact or interaction (including visual, verbal, or psychological) where consent is not willingly given or obtained, but instead accomplished through force, intimidation, coercion, manipulation, or threat, for the sexual stimulation of the perpetrator or any other person. (For visual, verbal and psychological think about being shown pornography for the purpose of the abuser to feel aroused, think about comments about a girl’s changing body made by a neighbor, or think about being shown the abusers naked body or body parts for his arousal)
Definition created by combining the works of:
Wounded Heart by Dan Allender and Rid of My Disgrace by Justin and Lindsey Holcomb
How does an abuser keep a child from telling an adult?
An abuser uses an array of options to keep a child silent. He may tell the child “You liked it” “You wanted this” or tell the child that he will get in trouble if he tells, or that nobody will believe the child if he tells. The abuser may threaten to hurt the child or that if the child’s family knew what the “the child has done” it would devastate the child’s mother or father. Lastly, the abuser may offer gifts like videos the child can’t watch at home, or maybe the abuser will say he won’t play or spend time with the child anymore. (Remember the abuser is mostly likely close to the family and trusted by the adults)
How many women have been sexually abused?
The research says that 1 out every 3 women have been sexually abused by the age of 18. (APA) As for men, the statistic is 1 out of every 5. Of course, this statistic is also thought to be low since most people don’t talk about their sexual abuse.
We are here to help!
We know this information can be alarming and bring panic. We know that parents really want a way to prevent sexual abuse from occurring. We also know that because sexual abuse happens at the hands of someone the child knows we need wisdom and strategic thinking to guide us.
Shielding Innocence is currently working on conferences that:
- Identify abusers and possible situations to avoid
- Teach you how to talk to you child about his private parts
- Normal child sexual development (playing doctor) compared to sexual abuse
- How to have an open and connected relationship with your child which helps keep perpetrators from choosing your child to abuse
- Good boundaries to have when visiting other families’ homes
- What to do if it does happen to your child
- What to do if you (the parent) have been sexually abused